Ok...so surprisingly enough in a place called Freekonia, the inhabitants are the weirdest bunch of nutjacks you are likely to meet.
Aside from the fact that demons, vampires and all other kinds of wackjobs are running around the frickin place, that is only the beginning. The town doctor is a self-mutating psycho, the bar owner is a cigar-chomping turtle not to mention the Terminator-esque police officer patrolling the streets with an itchy trigger finger and grenades to spare!
A camp werewolf, six-shooting taxi driver, murderous gardener, undead rock band and boobilicious fitness instructor can be found on the island along with many, many more freaky assholes...I mean...inhabitants! Take a look at some of the main cast below.
Harvey is the youngest member of the Karluff clan. He attends Oppidum High school whilst, much to his constant annoyance, working part time as a bellhop for his father at Morbid Heights.
Harvey may appear to be an average teenage dirtbag, but he does however, have a very important secret!
The new owner and manager of the hotel Morbid Heights is the demon Horace Karluff.
Along with his dysfunctional family, Horace has moved to Freekonia looking for a better life and he sees the Heights as the perfect place to start. With a money-guzzling wife, her wallet-draining daughter and his son to support, the little grey fella has his work cut out for him!
Much to her dismay, Sinthia moved to Freekonia with her husband to take over the hotel Morbid Heights.
Leaving behind the designer stores and endless beauty therapy treatments, Sinthia is not happy taking on a grotty, old fossil of a hotel without a hair salon in sight! Like her son, Sinthia too has a dark secret lurking in the shadows. This one however may not stay under lock and key.
With all the attitude of a spoilt, 17 year old brat and then some to spare, Christina is Sinthia's daughter from her previous scam...erm, marriage.
The move to Freekonia was met with more resistance from Christina than anyone as it meant leaving her friends, school and most importantly...gossip! After an initial threat to run away it still remains to be seen whether Christina will settle into Freekonian life or not.
The most evil, grotesque, violent and depraved creature ever to walk the lands of Freekonia. Count Timothy Felch Munntington III looks over the Forsaken Land from atop Mount Sinister with his evil gaze.
This foul vampire sees himself as an evil genius and is a legend in his own mind. He spends his waking hours scheming to find a way to rule Freekonia and also to walk in the sunlight. With the arrival of a certain young boy, his foul prayers may have been answered.
Ex-pole dancer and hot-assed vampire chick Trixie is the right hand woman to the evil Count Munntington and serves as his loyal assistant and trusted advisor.
In a band of miscreants without many braincells to share between them, Trixie is probably the sharpest knife in the crusty drawer (not that it is saying too much!).
If Trixie is the Count's right hand, then Foedo would be the left...well probably more like a rotten toe or manky ear. This rat-munching, toadlike creature serves as the Count's dogsbody and guineapig for all his foul schemes.
Luckily, the grotty little demon is adept in re-growing body parts and has an uncanny tolerance to pain. These two traits have seen him survive dozens of potentially lethal scrapes while working for the Count!
Rupert & Ravage
If you need someone to guard your home through the daylight hours when you really don't want to be disturbed then why not employ a giant, two-headed dragon?.
This fearsome creature looks terrifying but in actual fact, one of the 'twins' is blind and peace-loving albeit fire-breathing and the other half is the sadistic killer and does have sight...but no teeth or ability to crozzle his victims. Talk about the wrong tools for the job but it does at least give hapless visitors a chance to escape. With that said, once Rupert and Ravage get their act together and brains in sync, they still pose a pretty destructive threat.
There is only one way to cross the ocean and through the Wall Of Fire into the Echo of the Earth to reach Freekonia and that is to take a trip with one time Grim Reaper and now travel operator, Grimm! This bony boatman has the supernatural abilities to move his boat across the astral plains and ferry folks between dimensions. If you can find him and have the necessary payment then Grimm can give you passage...but that payment is quite a price.
The musty, crusty old bugger who narrates the story of Freekonia is this filthy castaway that found himself washed up on the shores of the island decades ago. After losing all his crew mates and possessions and with no way back to our plain of existence, Fungor set up camp on the beach and has been living their munching fish and coconuts ever since.
To keep himself occupied on those long days and nights (unless an interesting magazine washes up on the beach) Fungor took to writing his Diary Of Freekonia. He spends his time lurking...I mean observing the locals and wildlife and telling the wild and crazy stories of what he sees.
The most fearsome hunter to walk the planet is this burly, angry chap. There is not a creature to walk, slither, swim or fly that he hasn't put a bullet or other instrument, be it sharp or blunt - he doesn't care, into.
Sid is a wanderer and can never be pinpointed as he moves around so much. You could find him in the Desert of Despair...the Frosty Plains or Rancid Swamp, but one thing is for sure he will be hunting some poor critter. Sid has only one goal in life and that is to have true claim to being the greatest hunter ever to live and to have ruthlessly murdered every species to draw breath. There is one demon-human hybrid recently to arrive on the shores of Freekonia that he would be very interested to learn of!
Of all the belly-crawling, slimy creatures on the island then this lawyer has to be the lowest. Kurt works as the personal advisor and counsel to Governor Soranus and if there is a lawsuit to be had or money to be extorted, he won't be far away.
This dastardly suit is the smarmiest, most scheming scumball on Freekonia and would sell his own grandma to the ripper clan to earn a few extra bucks. Kurt D'Honesto is one of the most intelligent and crafty inhabitants on the island and if you come across his path, chances are you are about to be in serious financial trouble. He could squeeze pennies from a stone...just make sure you aren't that particular unfortunate pebble.
The resident handyman and gardener at Morbid Heights is this beer-swilling lout. By day, he likes to spend his time out in his shack drinking beer and reading the latest copy of Frazzler. If there is a job that needs doing with his name on it you can guarantee he will be nowhere to be seen.
However, under the moonlight he undergoes an amazing transformation to become the most fabulous werewolf you have ever seen. This lunar incarnation not only completes all those missed chores, keeping him in daytimne drinking, but he is also the most fantastic landscape artiste extraordinaire you have ever seen!
The greatest rock band, possibly of all time, are the undead headbangers Rancid Scrotum. Ever since their debut album, Labial Feedback hit number 1 on the Oppidum charts, this foul foursome have been touring the astral plains with their unique brand of horror-rock! If there is a gig to be played, the crypt is opened and the bones dusted off ready to shred the dead.
If you have never seen a werewolf on lead guitar, a drummer open up his head mid solo or even a lead singers guts tumble to the stage you don't know what you are missing. Tickets for these shows are like hens teeth so if one of these golden tickets comes your way...get ready to rock to your bones.
Frank The Ferret